My boss is a 100 pound chain smoker who runs on diet coke and Honey-Do Lattes.

I'll call her Z.  Z never sits down and has a feisty attitude.  She's the first to shout out a That's What She Said and always wears those horrible Manager Goggles- the ones that see any and every little mistake or crumb left on the floor after closing, yet always miss out on the job well done's.  Yeah, those goggles.  I hate those goggles.

Anyway, I like her.  She's tiny and tough- two traits I quite approve of.
Although I don't know many details, I'm aware that she's been recently widowed.
Z has been really good about remembering that Jody is gone, and in working with my hours so I can spend more time with him before his next deployment.  As I was leaving work the other day, Z asked me if I was going to make a special sign to hold for Jody while I wait at the pier.
Of course I laughed and said Heck No!  I explained that I was just ready to see him.
I just want him home, I'm so tired of being alone, you know?

Right away, I realized what I had said, and quickly apologized, acknowledging that she does indeed know, she too is tired of being alone.  I felt horrible.  She nodded and brushed it off as best as she could, but I could see that she was hurting.  Although I know that she understood what I meant, I couldn't help but feel incredibly selfish and ungrateful as I left work that day.

As I walked back to my car, I should have thanked God that my husband is indeed coming home, that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel, that he's in no immediate danger, and that the Lord has even given him to me.  Too often I dwell on missing him, wondering why I got stuck with the absent husband, what in the world He was thinking when he decided to make me a military wife in Hampton, VA.  How lucky I am that I get to bake my man cookies on Sunday night, get dressed up Monday morning, and then head onto base to watch him pull back in.  Then I get to take him home with me.  How excited and good I feel knowing that he'll be sitting next to me in just one week!
I hope that in the future I am better able to display my true sense of peace towards the life that I am leading today, regardless of how often I hanker to gossip over life's inconveniences.

That night, my neighbor stopped me on my way into my apartment.  She asked me how I was doing, and told me that she'd been praying for me.  What a blessing!  As we chatted, we ended up reveling over the gorgeous sunsets and the beautiful fall colors surrounding us right now.  She confessed feeling unhappy about living in Hampton, and but concluded that God's beauty is everywhere- whether back in California where she's from, in Montana, or here in the city of Hampton, Virginia.
It's up to us to grab onto this short life that we have, and to move forward with intention.

Thinking this through tonight brought me back to one of my very favorite quotes.  It makes me smile and stand taller with every read.

'When I look at the galaxies on a clear night- when I look at the incredible brilliance of creation, and think that this is what God is like, then instead of feeling intimidated and diminished by it, I am enlarged...I rejoice that I am a part of it.'

-Madeleine L'Engle