I spent all afternoon walking a five mile loop with the kids today.  What normally takes me just over an hour took us three and a half.  Kids are slow.  They get hungry.  They have to pee.  They talk.  So.  Much.

Important note: These quotes happened before mile marker 3.5 when sore legs emerged and all hell broke 

loose.

The Blue is Jesse, 8

Pink is Abigail, 10 

(in reference to a baby's bottle)

I know why they're called nipples.  Because they look like nipples.  And babies suck out of them.

Only, they need to be a little brown-er.

(To a stranger in the park)

She's exactly like a vampire.  Kayla, show her your teeth.  And she sparkles in the sun.  Also, she likes spinach.

Yeah!  Like a Vampire!  Only, you're not pretty.

 Here, have a tic tac.

 I think I deserve more than three tic tacs.

You just can't win, can you?  Oy Veh.